


Unchained.

by kya0810



Category: SixTONES (Band)
Genre: Confirmation, Consent, Face off, Flashbacks, Friends to Lovers, Fucking underage fuck off children, High School AU, Hurt/Comfort, Library Sex, M/M, Masturbation, Middle School, Phone Sex, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Semi-Public Sex, Underage Sex, Valentine's Day, a whole lotta feels, again this contains UNDERAGE SEX, alternative universe, boy next door
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:26:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26023387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kya0810/pseuds/kya0810
Summary: Who was the beauty and who was the beast?
Relationships: Matsumura Hokuto/Morimoto Shintarou
Comments: 4
Kudos: 15





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING WARNING WARNING
> 
> This work contains underage sex. I repeat, UNDERAGE SEX. If you didn't feel comfortable with this tag please withdraw yourself from this fiction.
> 
> And here's the real author's notes:  
> Soooooooo I'm finally done with this :< it was like getting your heart clenched constantly in 3 days and HokuShin is not even my OTP :<< My initial plan was to make this into a triangle love story (to include my baby Taiga) but I decided to focus on the mutual feelings they have for each other because they were beauuuutiful :<<<  
> Okay, so I hope you guys enjoy reading this messy piece of mine :<  
> Feel free to leave comments below so I can reflect on my own writing :> every feedback is appreciated <3

Four subjects, three days left, two people solving one problem taking ages.

“Shintaro, for the n-th time, when you move something to the other side of the equation it switches the sign!”, Hokuto sighed, blinking his eyes to cleanse away the tiring situation, feeling absolutely hopeless for Shintaro,

“If I could do it in the first place I wouldn’t have called you over…”, Shintaro pouted, equally exhausted, he threw the pen away and decided to give up.

Shintaro jumped on the bed and landed on this face, didn’t even bother to continue breathing. He was on his last year of middle school already, and if something could be worse it was definitely entering high school with elementary math level. Hokuto, as a top student, who was three years older and would be graduating this year, felt responsible to take care of his younger childhood friend.

“Get up Shintaro, at least solve this so we don’t leave anything hanging.”

“If you insist then go solve it yourself, genius,” Shintaro mumbling with his mouth stuck on his pillows, all relaxed for a recharging sleep,

Hokuto sat next to him, lying down slowly, facing Shintaro. He put one hand on the boy’s head and caressed the sunkissed hair, playing with some tangled locks, he lifted his head up with the elbow, calling the younger’s name until Shintaro turned his head to him, lips still pouting,

“I know the past days have been hard on you, but I’ll be graduating soon, then who’s gonna help you with all this? When I’m no longer here, I have to make sure that you can do stuffs yourself.”

Hokuto’s words were gentle whispers that soothed Shintaro’s frustration, he curled his body facing Hokuto, meeting the older’s eyes. The boy lowered his eyes as if he were thinking about what Hokuto had just said, about a future that he had to deal with things which were still out of his reach right now.

“But I need you here,” Shintaro snuggled closer to Hokuto, head almost touched the wide shoulders, fingers brushing Hokuto’s palm, “can’t imagine there will be one day you’re off to college and I’m still here doing meaningless work, like going to school, having no fun at all.”

“People grow up, Shintaro. I don’t want to leave you either, but it’s just a matter of time that you’d be graduating soon and join me in college too, or get a job, we can literally do anything we want. Live together, maybe?”, Hokuto reached for Shintaro’s chubby cheek and gave it a squeeze when he heard the boy sound like an abandoned puppy.

“What if you had new friends in college, and they would be as gorgeous as you are, and same taste in music, and you guys are gonna spend time discussing books I would never understand, and then you’re gonna spend alllll your time with them without even recalling my existence, and-”

Hokuto covered Shintaro’s mouth with his hand, laughing out loud, and Shintaro swore, before his eyes was the most beautiful person he had ever met, how Hokuto’s eyes sparkling in the dark, smiling so wide that his fangs were showing. Hokuto once said he wanted to be a wolf in his next life. Shintaro thought that would hold a high probability, given the fact that Hokuto was already utterly ravishing, like the alpha leader of a hound pack, yet he was soft, and caring, and always so serene.

“I have you.” Hokuto answered with a serious gaze, full of sincerity gleaming the bright of the northern star, and the look they shared in that moment was directly carved onto Shintaro’s heart, each pump was now a reminder, of how they devoted themselves to another.

But deep down Shintaro knew it wasn’t so pure a promise.

No math problems could compare to the adversity of constraining what your heart desired.

And Shintaro’s? His heart yearned for the alluring creature in front of his eyes.

Before he knew how to buy himself food at the convenient store, he knew he loved Hokuto.

He had been on Hokuto’s back on the way home, been eating the bento Hokuto made for him on a school trip, slept at Hokuto’s place thousands of times, bathed together, played together, studied together, like they could never be separated.

Not until Shintaro experienced puberty, when he began to feel weird hormones running both inside the heart and the pants, so much to feel that there was a time he held a grudge on his own sense to have the audacity to think about Hokuto as something he could conquer. And Hokuto, the naïve Hokuto who was always there for some skinship that made Shintaro’s fist clench so tight that it could crush a tennis ball, how the older leaned in to collide their heads during a wrestling on the bed that got Shintaro go nuts and almost let out a gasp, how Hokuto rested his head on Shintaro’s laps when they waited for the meteor rain, and the boy wasn’t bold enough to look down, afraid that if he ever saw those pursing lips, he would claim them as his right away.

So he wished upon the stars, if only they could be like this forever, if only he still got the strength not to fall for the older too hard, not to hurt both of them by letting out the beast inside.

Everyday to Shintaro was like walking on ice. Just one action passing the line, this would be over. Just in one second, or even a split of it, could Shintaro not shut his heart silent, this would be over.

Had Shintaro not been through all the arcs of love them all?

**Acceptance** (noun)

_A person's assent to the reality._

The easiest step, love’s baby step. He knew he loved Hokuto from sunrise to sunset and over, he knew he loved Hokuto when the moon was up high, full or crescent, he knew he loved Hokuto when the older’s smile sang Shintaro to sleep like a long-lost lullaby. He knew it when his heart constricted, a miraculous pain, and every heartbeat screamed Hokuto’s name.

**Jealousy** (noun)

_A wave that comes and goes, a surge of emotions called by the name of anger, envy, sadness, resentment._

Shintaro’s ears pricked up when someone mentioned Hokuto.

The demon inside him stiffened up, intensively, alertedly. It scraped one claw along the bottom of his stomach, green-eyed and hungry.

Shintaro laughed indifferently and politely with the girls going next to Hokuto when they accidentally met on the way home, eyes aimlessly glancing. Sometimes the devil whispered to his ears that he should just grab Hokuto and bite him by the neck, claim him, mark the possession. But then sadness took over the wheel, dropping words like venom into his heart, that he would never have the right to do so, not to mention the courage to even imagine it.

**Completion** (noun)

_The adequacy of well-fed emotions, where someone feels they belong to someone, and they make it happen together._

Right here, right now. When Shintaro was lying next to the light of his life, evenly breathing, soundly sleeping. Who cared about how his math problem would be going, it could go anywhere it wanted, from negative to positive infinity. Who cared about the life ahead when Hokuto would leave their hometown for the tempting Tokyo, because sooner or later, he would follow Hokuto ‘till the end of the line. That sounded like plan.

It finally came. Hokuto’s final semester. February was nothing but flickering snow on Hokuto’s hair, flushed cheeks and runny noses because of the cold, and Shintaro’s warmth following him around like a small puppy with tons of affection. And Shintaro? That kid skipped class again, which was not even a surprise by now despite the next several weeks would be his middle school graduation exam, but he got one more important thing to do. He wandered from streets to streets, got his eyes on hundreds of candy shops, tried the taste of literally every chocolate flavor in town, but nothing was clicking. The sun went down in a blink of an eye, and Shintaro crawled home with that mournful face for finding nothing for his “friend”.

The bell woke Shintaro up, he realized he was fainted for a few hours and it was already as dark as the magician’s hat, and may his miracle approach him when he was still in a daze.

“Hokuto?”,

“If it wasn’t me then who’s it sleepyhead, brought you dinner.”

“Thanks,…hey wow what are you carrying on your back? It’s huge!”

“Chocolate from every-freaking-girl I have ever talked to, or not, or even met, in my entire life.”, Hokuto rolled his eyes as he put down the humongous bag of chocolate on the kitchen table, proceeded to go straight into Shintaro’s room.

“The prince, huh…So…did you say yes to anyone?”

Shintaro asked with such a low tone it almost sounded like a hum, like his heart would stop beating, like his life depended on it. He playing with his battery-dead phone while waiting for the response, eyes not focusing on the phone at all.

If Hokuto said yes…

“I didn’t say yes to anyone,”

_Then I still have a chance with you._

Hokuto, and his same old trick again, sitting beside Shintaro, locking eyes with him. The older fondled Shintaro’s hair, put some locks behind the ears, gently patting his head. Shintaro almost dropped the phone on his hand, so he tightened his grip and silently snorted, he couldn’t even hide the happiness written on his forehead,

“…just not now. I will someday.”

Shintaro felt like he’d just been pulled back to reality, as it constantly murmured into his ears like the monster behind the closet, that Hokuto had all the choices he wanted, and now the boy didn’t know if he had even been on the list. Someday, Hokuto would fall in love with someone, boy or girl. They would date on Christmas Eve and kiss below the mistletoe, would travel alongside, read books, share meals, sleep on one bed, make their own family. Hokuto would wake that person up every morning with freshly-made coffee and a stealing kiss. He would make the person bento, then hug them goodbye, and kiss them home. All the thing that Shintaro had wished for.

He promised himself he would lock the door. He swore he would silence the beast.

But if life went the way you intendedly calculated, then what was the fun of it?

“Hey, you okay?”, Hokuto cupped his cheek and made the boy focus on his eyes again,

“Yeah, I’m good, it’s nothing.” Shintaro turned away to avoid his eyes,

_No, I’m not. I’m scared, Hokuto. I’m scared that you’ll be leaving me, just right after I close my eyes._

“I’m graduating in two weeks, Shintaro. Time flies. I’m gonna be nineteen soon, and I think I’ve chosen a college for myself already.”

_Would you ever choose me then? Would you ever plan to keep me close?_

“Not a really big thing, but I guess I’m going to Toudai. Of course there will be an entrance exam, and it’s gonna be hard, but with my academic performance at the moment things should work out well,”

_I don’t want to be a fifteen-year-old kid living across the house. I don’t want to be your little brother, I don’t want your protection, and I don’t want you to be out of my life._

“So my high school life is gonna end in two weeks like wowww. Like a shooting star.”

_No one will ever touch me the way you do. It hurts._

_My heart, my head, my whole body, like getting stitched by hundreds of deadly bees._

_Take this pain off me, please._

Shintaro threw himself on Hokuto, fell completely into Hokuto’s arms, hugging him tight, burying his head in Hokuto’s chest. Hokuto startled at the younger’s sudden act, first he parted his lips, intended to say something. But Shintaro’s fragrance calmed him down, and Hokuto was spellbound by the mint-like scent of his hair, how it softly caressed his face, and how Shintaro held onto him with all he had. Hokuto was about to hug back when he heard those small hiccups being restrained, came along with the tears that wet his uniform.

Hokuto pulled Shintaro up to meet the boy. Watering eyes covered by shuffle bangs, puckering lips that could not shield the outflowing emotions, as the floodgates got open wider and wider each second pass. Shintaro’s walls collapsed, piece by piece. The monsters were released. It was a relief, and it also meant the end.

“Please don’t leave me.”

Shintaro formed the words out of the shaky air coming through his throat,

“Shintaro, I-…”

Before Hokuto could answer, Shintaro leaned in and pressed his lips to Hokuto’s, tears were still flooding down the chubby cheeks, and Hokuto widened his eyes. The younger kneeled before him and wrapped both his arms around Hokuto’s waist, holding on endearingly.

_Let me be selfish for one moment only. Everything happens in this room should just stay exactly where it is. You will forget this. Please forget all of this._

But it was Valentine anyway. Miracles only happened twice. If Christmas and mistletoe could not set the mood, then this was it.

That was hardly called a kiss by definition. Shintaro was just brushing their lips together, and Hokuto felt flattered, but not enough. Shintaro set the fire. Now it was his job to teach the kid how to do this probably.

Hokuto parted their moment for a while, he put his hand under Shintaro’s chin, leveled up the boy’s watery face,

“I won’t call that a kiss, Shintaro. It works like this.”

Hokuto lightly tilted his head, and he came closer, until they found each other again. Hokuto licked Shintaro’s lips to separate them, then he went for a light suck, that was when he really tasted Shintaro, a little salty from the tears, and it was freakingly sweet, like all chocolates combined. Shintaro returned the kiss as a quick learner, and they literally smashed their lips together, fighting with heightened emotions as weapons, drowning themselves into another type of feeling. Lust sneaked in, as thin as the string of their saliva, while they were still having fireworks booming in their head like drugs, smoking their mind with overflowing hidden thoughts that were bottled up for so, so long.

A part of Hokuto wanted this, and he was having it now.

_Hokuto was constantly frustrated back when he was fifteen, hormones drove him crazy every second he was with Shintaro, an eleven year-old kid, and he got no one to guide him through that catastrophic stage of youth. His hand burned at every touch and his eyes teared up at every gaze they shared, and Hokuto was totally whipped, he laughed his guts out with Shintaro by day and cried himself to sleep when the sun went down._

_He knew it was wrong, but he was no god’s child._

_Let it be Hokuto’s greatest sin._

_Let Shintaro be his sun, shining, shimmering, splendid, but scorching enough to burn, and distant enough to love._

Hokuto pushed Shintaro to the headboard and he managed to sit on Shintaro’s muscular legs, still thirsted on the lingering taste of Shintaro’s lips, and the younger was not any better, he grabbed Hokuto neck to pull him closer and they went on with this marvelous combat, hungry for each other. While their lips were busy sucking and discovering those steamy places, Shintaro’s hands decided to escape from his system, to play by their rules, as it found Hokuto thighs and gave them a squeeze. Hokuto was taken aback by the sudden contact but he got used to it right away.

And Shintaro knew Hokuto had given him the approval to move on. The boy rubbed hard on Hokuto’s body here and there, down the leg, up the abs, and deep inwards the crotch that made Hokuto whined between the sensual kisses. Shintaro opened his eyes and looked straight at the older’s, asking for another permission, and Hokuto leaned in as he curved his back, narrowed the space between them as if there was still any, dropped a hint of consent. The younger quickly removed Hokuto’s belt and pulled down the pants to his knees with a little help from him to lift his hips up. Hokuto did the exact same thing with Shintaro’s, he tossed the younger’s pants out of their sight, exposing everything of each other. Shirts were torn and thrown off the bed, until there was nothing left on their sweaty bodies.

_Sixteen’s Hokuto was nothing better. He went on dates with boys and girls yet nothing worked out. He kissed, he fucked, and he casted them out forever. His friends with benefits mentally tortured him day by day, because even when the physical need was satisfied, the black hole in his heart screamed Shintaro’s name, in class, at the gym, in the library, in the wildest dreams._

“Hokuto…are we really…?”, Shintaro panting hard, hands still discovering Hokuto’s body, going down and down until he gave Hokuto a pump, testing the waters.

“Ugh-…Agh! Yes, yes we’re doing this, for real. Unless you’re not ready…”

“No!”, Shintaro quickly wiped all the tears on his face, cupped Hokuto’s face and brushed the messy bangs behind his ears, holding onto him like he was handling a lifelong treasure, a rope dropped down the hollow cave, a parachute opened from thousands kilometers up above,

“I’ve always wanted you…”

Shintaro couldn’t hold it in anymore. He touched Hokuto’s neck and dragged the hand down the chest, playing with the nips, licking the collarbone area, drawing hickeys on the pale canvas,

“Even when we are doing this right now, if this turned out to be a dream then that’s fine. At least I have you for tonight.”

“Then I’m all yours.”

Hokuto slipped four words into Shinto ears and gave it a lick, more than enough to make Shintaro’s cock twitch with pre-cum. The older took both the cocks into his warm but rough hands, he tensed the mood up with firm strokes that made Shintaro’s grind his teeth, eyes closed because of the unearthly electricity running in his veins, each stroke was like a lighting strike containing thousands of volt units, hit directly into Shintaro’s system.

_At seventeen, Hokuto gave up. He was fed up with crying and some stupid wet dreams that drained all the energy needed for the day. So he convinced himself to leave, to buy himself time away, by diving into studying so hard that he became the best kid of the town. Yet his heart still got scratched everytime Shintaro giggled on his shoulder of a movie night, and he closed his eyes._

_“Just wait, Hokuto, please wait. Just a few more years, I promise. Until he grows up strong and beautiful, we will put an end to this suffer.”_

_He talked himself to sleep, magically survived seventeen._

Their foreheads collided and breaths shattering like midnight mist, the moonlight from outside the window hardly brightened up anything but only sharpened all the precious expressions they were wearing on their faces, thirst and hunger, bravery and hope. Shintaro was so engaged with Hokuto’s hands that he didn’t notice what was going on with his hips, and only mid-way that he realized there was another stunning scene under his nose.

Hokuto was preparing himself for Shintaro.

“Hokuto…”

“Focus, Shintaro. Focus on my hand. I’ll take care of the rest.”

Hokuto slipped his own fingers in, one, and two, and scissored himself as he muffled the wobbly moans, when Shintaro tried not to think much about what happened at the other side of Hokuto’s body. How it felt inside, how it stretched, and was it painful, would it break.

When they were nearly there to see stars, Hokuto stopped, and Shintaro felt unease immediately, but not for long. Hokuto wrapped both his arms around Shintaro’s neck to level up himself, held the younger’s cock right before his rim, caressed it a little before he angled himself and sank down without warning,

“AH!”, Hokuto moaned out loud by instinct, and Shintaro was just half-way in. His knees could not bare the bursting pleasure so they gave out gradually, making Hokuto sank down more, Shintaro dug his nails onto Hokuto’s flesh on the hips to keep him stable, but he was already falling apart.

“Are you…okay?”, Shintaro’s brain was mildly functioning at this point, but he still wanted to make sure the pain Hokuto was having would escalate to pleasure soon,

“Help me move”, Hokuto breathed out a sigh and pulled Shintaro in for a kiss,

Shintaro’s hip moved on its own, he couldn’t control the way he thrust inside Hokuto, so this was what the beast inside him looked like, drilling in Hokuto like there was no tomorrow. And Hokuto took part in the sex the best way he could, hips rolling in sync with Shintaro’s thrust, bouncing, trying new angles, until Shintaro shifted the hips a new way that made Hokuto gasped in their lewd kisses. _There, right there_. Shintaro accidentally hit the sweet spot and Hokuto just collapsed onto the younger’s shoulder, barely breathing, he brushed both his hand into Shintaro’s hair to calm himself down, little by little losing his consciousness.

Shintaro kept hitting Hokuto’s prostate until a wave of pleasure smashed their logic the most brutal way. While they were chasing their own release, Shintaro felt the words that he always wanted to say in the tip of his tongue.

_What if he didn’t return it?_

Hokuto moaned louder and louder each final thrust, calling out Shintaro’s name, almost screaming, as the name never sounded so raw and powerful. He was close, so close.

“I-…I’m coming, S-Shintaro…”

And with one last endearing kiss, Hokuto’s climax crept up on him. He came untouched. Shintaro took Hokuto’s cock and gave it some final pumps, prolonged the high, milking it all out while he was still drilling inside him. Shintaro came shortly after, spilling his all while biting hard on Hokuto’s shoulder. A mark to claim Matsumura Hokuto, his.

Hokuto, flushed cheeks, teary eyes, parting lips with saliva dribbling down the chin from the utmost pleasure, was more angelic than ever.

Shintaro gathering air back to his lungs, gained his consciousness back, and before his eyes was the thing he was the most afraid of. Bite marks on Hokuto’s shoulder, scratches on the hips caused by blunt nails, swollen lips tortured ‘till they were carrying the blood color, _the beast,_ the beast inside him got out and hurt Hokuto like this, he was all ready to be left alone when the sun rose up, to be tossed out of-

“I love you.”

_Hokuto at eighteen, wildly beautiful, wiser than ever, braver than ever._

“What did you just- ”, Shintaro was shaking, was it Japanese that he’d just heard? Or was it the light at the end of the tunnel and he was destined to be dying at this point?

“I said I love you, Morimoto Shintaro. Took me long enough.”

Hokuto whined as he lifted himself out of Shintaro’s cock, push both of them to lie on the messy bed, hugging Shintaro’s tight,

“You don’t have to return my feelings, all of this can just be a sex education anyway. You know, like a high school preparation course? I’m sorry if what we just did make you uncomfortable thinking of it in the morning, I truly am, but I just want to be selfish once in my life, to have you in my arms.”

He let go of Shintaro and sat up, ready to go gather his clothes and leave the room, maybe for good.

Until Shintaro took his hand and pulled him into an embrace again, soft and calming. Life was too short for anyone to miss the love of their life in front of their eyes, and Shintaro, young but determined enough to know what to drop and what to keep,

“I love you, Matsumura Hokuto.” He breathed into Hokuto’s neck, a reassuring melody.

“Say that again”, Hokuto’s voice trembling, his hold on Shintaro’s got firmer,

“I love you.”

“Again.”

“I love you.”

“A-Again”,

And Hokuto broke down crying like a fallen angel from heaven, his heart was beating the right way the first time in eighteen years, He started chewing on his lower lip and his eyes welled up with tears. Shintaro calmly patted on his back, like a promise, like he was tying the red string onto their pinky fingers, finally, _finally,_

“Matsumura Hokuto, I love you.”

The beast was gone. They were home.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drifted apart and reunited again.  
> Hokuto left for Tokyo. They have a relationship to work things out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm backkkkk with another fluffy lovey dovey from this cutie couple wheeeheeeeeee  
> OKay, so again, 
> 
> WARNING WARNING WARNING  
> This content includes underage sex. Please withdraw yourself from this fiction if you are uncomfortable with such tag.
> 
> So at the moment, I think they're good now. And this maybe the end. But who knows when the next inspiration would hit me right, so please enjoy this series and feel free to feedback below <3

“So…how are we doing this?”

Shintaro drawing circles on Hokuto’s bare chest which was reflecting the moonlight outside the nearby window,  _ ethereal,  _ he thought. Their first time was a mess but so raw, and so _ real _ , that Shintaro considered it one of the moments he would tattoo on his skin with pride. Hokuto helped the younger clean up afterwards, before there were hands propping on the bathroom door, jittery moans escaping the small space they were sharing, and Shintaro devoured Hokuto more than once that night.

“Any past experience?”, Hokuto casually asked while playing with Shintaro’s elbow.

“How could I?”, Shintaro curled up more into Hokuto’s embrace, “You know I only have you in mind my whole life…”

Hokuto opened his heavy eyes to investigate Shintaro’s reaction, and the treasure he got was Shintaro pouting lips and puppy gaze. If it weren’t for the exhaustion after rounds of sex, Hokuto would throw himself on Shintaro again, because he would never be satisfied as long as Shintaro was around, physically and mentally. 

“What if I went to jail because of this? You’re not even an adult yet.”, Hokuto’s evil smirk gradually appeared on his face, made Shintaro jumped back, he sat up immediately,

“No, no! I wanted this! I-…I would tell them I…I was the one to beg for the sex, or even, I blackmailed you to do this with me, and…yeah! I’m under sixteen so I can’t go to jail, I would just say that I ra-”

Hokuto stopped Shintaro’s monologue with an endearing kiss, no licking, no sucking, nothing sensual, just a kiss that was made out of pure loving affection that Hokuto had been dreaming about for how long he could not remember. They took their hands and held them tight without the need of words, they kissed, like right before that was their last breaths, and oxygen was less important than each other’s syrupy lips that had come together for how many times, no one ever knew.

Hokuto slid his hand into Shintaro’s hair, slowly, carefully, like handling a flower on a hanging cliff. Shintaro gulped when they parted, he found Hokuto’s smiley eyes. The older laid his head on Shintaro’s firms shoulder, giggling, hands seizing tighter,

“You don’t know how long I’ve been holding back not to kiss you like that.”

Shintaro was never so sure in his life that their feelings were mutual. Butterflies in the stomach, streams of oxytocin rebelliously released, drowning all his senses, causing a pandemic in the brain.

“Please do it whenever you want. And when you don’t, I’ll take you there.”

\--

14 days until Hokuto’s departure.

Shintaro spent time in class thinking of Hokuto while wandering his eyes outside, at the cherry blossom tree right next to the glass window. Light roseate petals dancing with the wind, and Shintaro’s heart clenched a bit, as if he could feel how the time was flying before his eyes. Soon, Hokuto would leave, like how the graceful flowers left the branch. 

He walked slowly but not minding his step at all, hands in the pockets, mind was on the clouds. He had been in a one-sided love for so long, but now that everything had changed, it was hard to predict what would happen next. How would things go from now on? At what pace should they make this work? Not to mention, he only had the next thirteen days to name their relationship and reshape his future. Now that they had each other, it wasn’t his own to decide anymore.

Coming close to the school gate, Shintaro lifted his head to find Hokuto leaning on the stone wall, waiting for him. A smile bloomed on his face, although the previous thoughts were still bugging him, but at least in that moment, Shintaro’s heart felt at ease. Hokuto turned his head and caught Shintaro in the eyes, he smiled fondly at the boy, and offered his hand out. Shintaro casually took it, and put them into his trench coat’s pocket. 

Hokuto’s hand was big, rough from the karate practice, warm from his perfect body heat for hugs in this weather, when the winter was saying its last goodbye. They were moving side by side, exchanging nothing. They were in no need for words. Just like this, heading to the sunset.

Silky beams of dusk sketched themselves on ranges of mountains, burned the clouds veiling that deep sky, flickering colors running from firey red to silent violet. 

And Shintaro stole some looks at Hokuto, when the light shadowed his face, Hokuto was beautiful. Shintaro had been sneaking his look onto Hokuto since forever, but now when he stared at him again, the feelings were different. Those sparkling obsidian eyes, the elegant nose and rosy lips, sensibly lying above the sharp jawline. Had Hokuto always been this otherworldly magnificent.

“What’s on your mind kiddo?”

They were sitting with no distance between each other, all drowsy, looking at the night sky from Shintaro’s window, bathing in moonlight. Hokuto fixed Shintaro’s hair, put some curls behind the ears, peacefully watching the boy playing with his hand, but today, he felt a little heavy inside and that was bugging Hokuto.

“It’s nothing, I was having some stupid thoughts…”

“Shintaro, none of your thoughts are stupid to me. I’ll take them all in.”

Shintaro laced their fingers together. His mind was tangled up with so many scenarios he could hardly say anything. But there was a rush telling him that he had to say something to Hokuto. They didn’t have much time left, so if anything should be done, it must be done now. Shintaro could never put their relationship at risk.

“Can I confirm who I am to you again?”

Hokuto was taken aback. They hadn’t said anything, there was no bond confirmed, no strings attached, no promises, no plans. At first, Hokuto thought saying “I love you” was enough because he didn’t want Shintaro to devote his mind too much in their relationship, the boy still had his own adventures to discover. But he didn’t expect to see Shintaro this concerned about their future, and for now, he didn’t expect to be the one really on Shintaro’s mind, distracting him from all future intention, the controlling factor of his moods. 

“I would say lover. Am I too old for you?”

And that was how Shintaro’s last defense, defeated. He wrapped his hand around Hokuto, sniffing the older’s sweet shampoo and got tickled by the damped hair. Hokuto just leaned his head backwards on the sofa they were sharing, enjoying the moment.

“No!...I mean...Lover. I like that.”, Shintaro secretly smiled into Hokuto’s coal hair,

“Sorry I didn’t say anything since...you know.”

“No, no, it’s fine, really. I just...I think I love you much more than I thought I would…”

Shintaro was being more honest than he had ever been. He had always been a straight forward kid, but when it came to his feelings for Hokuto, he couldn’t let his heart decide what to say, afraid that he would hurt both of them, that he would terminate their relationship, and accidentally break their hearts. 

“How can you be so sweet all the time?...Jeez, now I don’t wanna go for Toudai anymore…”, Hokuto still had his eyes close. 

“You should go. I honestly don’t want you to, but I have to let you go. I will miss your everything, Hokuto.”

Shintaro got closer, and closer, until he climbed onto Hokuto’s body and hugged him faceoff. Hokuto was taller than him by half a head, this position made him feel deeply cared and adored. Shintaro fitted in Hokuto perfectly, like pieces of a puzzle. Shoulder by shoulder, hips by hips. 

“I’ll come back to you every chance I have.”

“Me too, I’ll hop on trains every time I miss you.”

“Is that a lot?”, Hokuto embraced him affectionately, eagerly smiling while patting Shintaro’s back.

“Not even close, there will be times that I miss you, like when I need you for homework, I want to taste your cooking, or I can even make your mom send you something which is too unnecessary for a shipping service, but still important enough for me to hand it to you, directly. I’ll just smash your door and come in to you”, Hokuto was surprised that Shintaro was smart at this, imagining all the stuffs out beforehand.

“And if I wasn’t home?”

“I’ll wait outside.”

“But what if I went on a work trip without noticing anyone?”

“I’ll still be waiting for you.”, Shintaro said with confidence.

Hokuto heard it now, how their hearts were harmoniously beating. Shintaro would always be there for him. It was all worth it, waiting for Shintaro to grow up, and giving him the best thing he had. It was all worth it. 

  
  


_ “Hug me?” _

_ Shintaro obeyed. He hugged Hokuto, resting his head on the older’s wide shoulder, trying his best not to shed a tear. He must not shed any tears. He didn’t want to make Hokuto regret leaving his side. This was for the best. _

_ “Hey, look at me,” _

_ And Shintaro looked up, before his eyes was Hokuto holding a necklace, with a silver ring pendant. The ring had a mirror-like surface and about eight millimeters in width, which was kinda rare for rings to be made into this shape. Because Hokuto had them customized.  _

_ He circled his arms around Shintaro’s neck to put it on him, the ring shone brightly, like a northern star, twinkling on Shintaro’s chest. _

_ “When they shimmer, Shintaro,” Hokuto glued their foreheads together, he closed his eyes, and clinked the exact same thing on his middle finger to the one on Shintaro, “is when I think of you, and I know you’ll be thinking of me too.” _

_ Shintaro didn’t say a word. The boy only stared at him. Studying his every detail. _

The first few days without Hokuto was utterly disastrous. Whenever Shintaro saw a man with roughly the same height, he would just follow them, and when he reached his hand out, ready to grab their coats, reality hit him like a tsunami, that Hokuto wasn’t here anymore. They tried to text each other as much as they could find the time, but with Hokuto diving in tons of research papers and Shintaro rehabilitating his school life, sometimes they only got one text from the other, at least every day.

“Good night, love.”

“I miss you.”

“I love you.”

And one day turned into two days, into one week, sometimes two weeks. Shintaro kept sending the texts and went to sleep super late at night, waiting for a response. He had been coming up with all the scenarios given the situation, from if Hokuto was living in the different time-zone because he went abroad, to if Hokuto had been knocked down in his apartment, alone, cold and uncared for. Or if Hokuto had had someone else.

_ No, he would never betray me. _

Lying on his bed, the bed they used to share their first moment, toying with the silver ring on his neck, Shintaro missed him, so bad there was a silent ache in his heart, unbearable, insuppressible. He knew that Hokuto was out there somewhere, but all was like a stab right into the chest while he could not hold Hokuto’s hand, or have him in his warm embrace and wish him goodnight with a firm kiss on the head, or have a moment with him at the back of a dark corner, where the streetlights could never reveal their hasty kisses. And his memory went on its own recording, lighting up the flashbacks of their magnificent first fourteen days together.

_  
_ _ It was the last day of Hokuto’s high school life. The girls were running chaotically in the hallway, in and out the classrooms, trying to ask for the second button of their favourite ones. Hokuto was being chased after by both boys and girls, they squeezed him into group pictures, trying to undress his shirt, making him sign on the skirts, everything that he no longer gave a care.  _

_ “I’m waiting for you at the spot.” _

_ The coming text saved Hokuto from the frantically mundane reality, as he rushed himself away, too fast to be chased. Hokuto found his way down the stairs, running across the field, sneaking into the library. He caught his breaths again, and he walked in slowly this time, passing by several mobile bookshelves, until he stopped at a spot,  _

_ “Obsidian.” _

_ His whisper mixed with breaths echoing to all corners of the library, carved into the old walls. And he wildly grinned as he heard the familiar response, _

_ “Emerald.” _

_ He turned around and Shintaro welcomed him with a deep satisfying kiss, lips perfectly matching, fighting back and forth. They parted away from each other, and Shintaro held his hand, led him to the latent corner behind the last shelf, pushed him up against the wall, hands started to discover Hokuto’s torso. _

_ Shintaro kissed him with passion, it was all open-mouthed and moisty, they could feel their shattered breaths dominated the air over oxygen. Hokuto cupped Shintaro’s face and pulled him up closer, and closer. The younger one narrowed down the last space between them, standing on the tips of his toes to match Hokuto’s height.  _

_ “You sure?”, Hokuto whispered between breaths, _

_ “Why not?” _

_ Until there was nothing in their way except for their crumpled clothes. Shintaro reached down and down, and he found Hokuto’s sensitive member. He freed the half-hard manhood, rubbing hard on the tip, stroking firmly as he was enjoying the cries from Hokuto’s inviting lips. He kissed Hokuto’s forehead, and then eyes, and then on the cheeks, down the neck, and up the lips again to swallow all the moans the older was making, lovely seductive. _

_ The library’s door suddenly opened, a few girls came in with phones in their hands, they were trying to take some last photos of every place of the school. Hokuto was feeling all kinds of pleasure, but being on cloud nine in a semi-public place like this hyped him up. He was stealing looks at them, head spinning with the case of being recognized, then their lives would be completely ruined. But it was thrilling. And he would never tell anyone that there was a splash of wanting it from him. _

_ Shintaro knew the look in Hokuto’s eyes. Firey lust, utmost sensation, and the desire to be noticed. So he tightened his fist on Hokuto, making the older gasped out, _

_ “Shin...Ah! Ugh...i-it’s so g-good…” _

_ “Hokuto, keep your voice down,” _

_ “I-...it was too...hah...ah...ugh…” _

_ Hokuto was moaning non-stop, and Shintaro had no choice but to shut him up with a hand on the mouth, pressing his head against the thick wall. Hokuto was for real suffocating, yet the boiling heat from the under part rehabilitated him every second. _

_ “mmph...UMPHH-” _

_ And Hokuto saw stars before the sun went down, he gripped Shintaro’s uniform too tight to the point it was almost torn apart, swimming in the pool of lust, then slowly slided down the wall. Shintaro kneeled down with him, he backed up his hand, only to find Hokuto’s silver saliva stringing on the palm of his hand, swollen lips opened up widely to get the air back into his life. _

_ Shintaro bent down Hokuto’s barely undressed shirt, caught the second button of the uniform with his teeth, and jerked out.  _

_ “This is mine. Congratulations on your graduation, Hokuto.” _

Hokuto was frustrated. Fuck homework, fuck schooltrip, fuck internship, it’d been two weeks since he last called Shintaro and  _ god  _ he missed him so bad. It was nearly the end of his first year in college yet nothing was really on his mind for the future. He’d just passed the final interview and got internship from one of the most influential firms in Tokyo, but this meant that he couldn’t spend his summer at their hometown, and he couldn’t miss his priceless opportunity either. 

Hokuto had a hard time choosing between enjoying his best time at Kanagawa for three months, diving down the coral reef, chasing Shintaro along the beach until the sun went down, and they would be lying in the same tent at night and saying to each other,  _ “the moon is beautiful and so are you”.  _

But it would be a waste if he decided to turn this offer down, given that he was the first freshman and sophomore-to-be to ever win the internship at his age, with remarkable academic achievements and social skills. Why would he even apply in the first place?

And Hokuto took the hard step for them. He made up his mind, he would stay in Tokyo. Having this internship meant higher probability to get a proper job not only to support himself, but to ensure a future where Shintaro was standing next to him, and they would live happily together, ever after. There would be no hundreds of kilometers distance, no late phone calls that drained the younger out, no argument like most couples about affordability, that was why it was all worth it.

Shintaro took the news with calmness.

Hokuto called him at midnight on a Saturday. Shintaro was at the beach, walking all alone, buried his thoughts deep down in the sand, and threw his mind far away into the ocean.

Hokuto told him with ease that he would not return this summer, and not sure about the next one, and the very next one.

He said  _ it was for the best. _

_ The last time I did something “for the best” was to let you go. It was regretful, but if I had every chance to turn things around, I would just keep it the way it should be. _

Shintaro was not that fifteen-year-old kid fascinating all about Hokuto like he used to be. Within the first few months when Hokuto wasn’t by his side anymore, he took up surfing, and he mastered it the way he wanted. He let the waves struck his body, how it pushed him down under the water, suffocated him until he found his way back into the surface, and gathered the air into his lungs again. His mind was blank but full of grainy noise like an old TV. Memories fighting with reality in his head. In the end, he hugged himself with a half-beating heart. 

_ “It’s okay, Hokuto, I’ll be sending lottttts of my summer pics that can annoy you anytime at work!” _

_ It was okay.  _

_ No, it was never okay. _

Shintaro was beaten up totally one month later. There were only two times they were actually having a late night conversation, which lasted about ten minutes each, before everything burnt down to silence again. He thought he was fine at first. 

He had taken up surfing, checked. Made new friends, checked. Attempted not to fail the final tests, checked. Bought a guitar, checked. Got on a motor and went out all night with friends, checked. Was proposed by a girl, checked. Turned her down and said he had already had someone, checked.

Got a response from Hokuto, unchecked.

Showered him with love as promised, unchecked.

Felt okay with giving Hokuto’s time, unchecked.

Held his hand, kissed him deep, pulled him close, 

All, unchecked.

July hit them like a breezy wind. Shintaro had no mood for surfing since it was raining outside. There was a storm coming this way. Shintaro was lying on his bed after trying all he had with those assignments from school, by himself. The only good thing that happened since Hokuto left was him managing to complete the academic work alone.

He held the ring in his hand, brought it up the street light outside. Shintaro loved keeping his room dark. It reminded him of their first touch. First kiss. First time. The ring twinkled, like a diamond, there was a sentenced engraved on the inside of it,

_ I’m with you ‘till the end of the line. _

Shintaro heard the lightning striking loudly outside, and there came the rain, hitting on his window like swords from above. The young boy picked up his phone and he started typing Hokuto’s number. He learned it by heart since he got his own phone at twelve. 

His thumb stopped at the call button. Would he take this one? Or would he turn it down as usual, and a second later a text would come saying how sorry and busy he was right now. 

But if that was the worst case then, anything new would be a better case. 

“Shintaro?”

The boy’s heart just jumped out of his chest. God, how much he’d missed this voice. Hokuto’s whisper sounded like a fairytale, and Shintaro just playing dead, he couldn’t comprehend anything right now. 

“Shintaro? You still there?”

It was like Hokuto had never left. The young boy set up the call out the speaker, he wanted to fill his room with Hokuto’s husky voice, little by little healed all the small scratches on Shintaro’s heart, making every memory back alive,

“Hey,”

Water started to fill his blinking eye. The way Hokuto called out his name was so soothing, like the snow on Hokuto’s hair in February, the warmth they shared on a forever road. 

“I miss you.”

Shintaro’s voice started to tremble, it was cracking down and down, he pressed his fist on his mouth not to let Hokuto know what state he was in. The ring laying inside that fist was being held so tight, all warmed up. 

“I miss you too.”

There came a silence, but they both knew their love was right. This felt right. If there was someone in this world whose voice could make such an impact onto your mental stage, that was the one to keep. 

“So,” Shintaro broke the pause, “How is everything?”

“I think I’m done with the day, actually, I was about to call you. Your name appeared on my phone right before I hit the call button.”, Hokuto happily giggled.

_ Stop it Hokuto, your cuteness can kill me. _

“I...um...I got proposed by a girl yesterday.”

_ What the fuck Shintaro? _

He didn't know why he blurted it out of nowhere. To be honest, Shintaro had never kept the proposal in mind, but now he had the chance, he felt the urge to have responsibility in their relationship, so he told Hokuto that, like a daily report. He didn’t want anything in the shadow when it came to the love of his life. 

“And what did you tell her?”, Hokuto was not even feeling any insecurity at all, he trusted Shintaro with all his heart. He was just curious.

“I told her...I had you.”

“Thank you for having me then.”

Hokuto said it with a large smile on his face, and Shintaro swore he could feel it, despite being on the other side of the line. 

“You know what, Shintaro? I really miss your touch.”

And the younger boy only thought was to hop on his motorbike and ride all the way to Hokuto’s apartment and have him right away.

“I can’t focus at school. You’re always on my mind…”

“I got a lot of work to do, this university is insane, I have no idea why firstyears have to write thesis at senior level of other universities. Lucky I’m good enough.”

“So…there would be less time for me from now on?...”, 

Shintaro sounded like he was about to cry for real by now, he could not hide anything when it came to Hokuto at the other side. And Hokuto would never get fed up with Shintaro’s puppy whine, it was his ultimate weakness afterall.

“I think of you every night. Before I went to bed, I remembered your sleeping face under the same blanket we used to share. I love it so much I dreamt of having you with me. Everyday, Shintaro.”

“I miss our touches. I miss it when you’re under me and we share kisses, cuddle until the moon is up, and…”

Shintaro jolted as he took control of his thinking process again, realizing where this was going.

“And what? What do you want to do with me?”

Hokuto silently get rid of his belt, he slipped his empty hand into his pants, eyebrows slightly pulled together, lips parting. 

“I would kiss you on the neck…while my hands are rambling on your abs, trying to undress you…”

Hokuto removed his pants from himself completely. He gasped as he first touched the half-hard cock, buried his face deep down the pillow, trying to muffle the moans that flew out from his throat unconsciously.

“I will push you down our bed, and you’d be under me, as I start kissing you fiercely, while my hands still doing their job, rubbing your crotch until you’re fully hard...”

Shintaro got used to this so quickly it turned Hokuto on even more, until he was painfully hard, the tip started to leak out a few drops of the malicious white substances. 

“I put a finger into you when you are distracted by the kiss,...and...and you will moan into my mouth.”

Hokuto did what Shintaro was “instructing” him to do. He caressed the rim in circles, and push one finger in, it was rough and scorching hot; it felt nothing like Shintaro, barely enough for him than every time they did it. But he only had himself now. So he kept pushing in and out, while the other hand still playing with the throbbing cock. Hokuto was howling like a wolf in pain, he was all sweaty, because Shintaro’s voice was like the drugs that infected his every blood cells, intoxicated his system and made his mind collapse.

“One, and two, and I scissored you when the fingers were still inside. I pulled them out, keeping the pose, and I stretched you open for me.”

And Hokuto followed up exactly the same. It was too much, way too much that his body couldn’t go on by itself, he curved his back and his knees bumped to one another. Hokuto was lying on oneside, eyes watering and hardly open, couldn’t even keep his mouth shut. 

“I got into you in one thrust. You were so tight we could barely breathe normally,”

Hokuto  kept rubbing his penis head back and forth,

“And we kept smashing into each other, until I filled your hole with my seeds, and with me, you come mercilessly untouched, like every time.”

Hokuto had this intense, unbearable orgasm, he groaned out loud and scrunched up into a spasming ball, gasping for air.

That was the most satisfying masturbation Hokuto had ever experienced.

“Shintaro...I wish you were here.”

The call ended without any notice. Hokuto thought Shintaro was just accidentally hitting the end call button, so he tried to reconnect. No signal.

He went for a bath to clean himself. He didn’t even remember when was the last time he successfully satisfied himself thinking of Shintaro. His internship killed him day by day. 

How about heading home for a night, just a night? How about calling sick, using all his absence permission? 

How about dropping all of these meaningless stuff and falling into Shintaro’s arms instead?

The bell rang. There was someone at the door. Hokuto had already wrapped himself in blankets.

_ Really, in this storm? _

He pulled himself up from his fluffy cozy bed. Looking at the peephole.

Hokuto was stunned. 

He rushed to open the door with shaky hands and heavy breaths.

Shintaro rushed over from the last shinkansen, soaking wet, falling his whole body onto Hokuto’s.

“I’m here.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it.  
> I didn't really want to end, but at this point everything is working so well that I don't wanna mess them up anymore :>>  
> Thoughts?

**Author's Note:**

> *bye bye demons hello lovey dovey couple*


End file.
